The Days Are Long, They Say

Everyone keeps telling me that “the days are long, but the years are short.”  This, of course, being in reference to your children growing up and how difficult the days seems compared to the seemingly lightening speed of them growing before your eyes.  I will say that I think they are right, but sometimes, on the hardest of days, the years also seem long.

I find myself wondering why my 2.5 year old (3 in June) just can’t be more grown up and help me more, or cry less, or need less from me.  I wonder why my six week old can’t just sleep longer than three hours… and that’s just one stretch a night, it’s typically 1.5 hours at a time.  I feel like, when they are older and need me less, life will be easier.  And I think it will be, in a way, but it’ll also be harder because, well, they will need me less.

Motherhood is an absolutely exhausting, frustrating, confusing, wonderful time.  In a five minute span I can go from completely elated looking at my son, to clenching my teeth at my daughter, to begging my son to just quit crying for two minutes, to laughing at my daughter.  I feel like I have an entire auditorium full of people living inside of me, and sometimes I’m not sure that even one of them is actually me.  I think I stepped out a while ago to run some errands and just never returned.  I’m hoping one day I’ll feel like myself again, instead of this multiple personalitied (yes, today it’s a word) crazy mom lady.

One day, I’ll look back and realize the days were shorter than I thought.  I try to keep this in mind when I wake up in the morning and realize I have another long day ahead of me.  I mentally prep for my daughter throwing tantrums, my son wanting to nurse and sleep on my lap and no where else.  I try to remember that my daughter is going to say something hilarious, like yesterday when she sang “jingle bells, jingle bells, Santa smells like cheese,” and that my son may just sleep in the pack and play by himself, and that, interestingly enough, I will be sad that he’s not sleeping on my lap, and also grateful.  I will remember that I am only a human, raising other humans.  We are all trying to have our best day, every day, but that’s not realistic.  The best I can hope for are a lot more good days than bad, and right now, I’m lucky enough to say that’s what I have.

Hello and Welcome

Hello and welcome to my new blog.  I’ve tried this blogging thing once or twice and have never been too successful with keeping up with it, but I’m hoping to change that with this blog.  Although I have no idea why I am trying to achieve this goal at this exact moment, since I currently have a daughter who is almost three and a son who is six weeks.  Maybe the sleep deprivation has made me delusional.  I mean, yea, that’s definitely it.

A little about me, to start you off with.  I am 32 years old (eek), married to my main squeeze for almost nine years, living near Raleigh, NC, and crafting in every spare second I have available (when I’m not washing dishes or laundry… how is there so much of these two things?!).  I mainly crochet these days, since it’s super portable and easy to do with a sleeping baby on my lap and a spunky toddler, but I also enjoy playing with polymer clay and other random crafts when I have the time, which I imagine I will have again in 3 to 5 years…

I don’t really enjoy cooking.  In fact, I kind of hate how long it takes compared to how long it takes to eat.  I mean, two hours to make, 15 minutes to eat?  Eh. But I am going to try to be better.  There are only so many frozen pizzas you can eat before you realize it’s probably not the best health decision for you and your family.  I do make a green smoothie once or twice a week though… so, you know… i’m totally healthy and junk.

Well, let’s hope I can get on here frequently and share lots of fun and amusing things with you.  I’m hoping I’ll be napping most of the time instead, but when I’m not, I hope to be sharing with you.  So, welcome to my life!  Enjoy!